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Mon 27 Jan 2020: On the road again

How about some music?

On the road again (dum dum du du du du dumm)……I just can’t wait to get on the road again (dum dum du du du du dum)…….The life I love is makin’ Korfball with my friends (dum)….And I can’t wait toooooo get on the road again. Yee-har! Yesssir! ***

We have been travelling again this past week – accepting honorary korfing doctorates on the hallowed boards of Cambridge University (Sports Centre,) looking cool cruising the mall, playing chooons at the Hive Leisure Village in Ely, parking the bus in Croydon (or attempting to,) tooting our ref’s whistles and bossing it at the Europa Shield tournament in Germany…..and swinging by the rubbish dump near Milton.The Korfing sirens call and we are inexorably drawn to them.

This week all of the senior teams have been in action, kicking off with T6, who had a run-out on Wednesday at Uni 1, pushing them hard and giving them a jolly fright indeed. Uni 1 have a blend of experience, height and accuracy in their team and a uniformly high level of energy. In defence you push them out to shoot from distance; in attack you collect, step in, drop back and do the basics….and the chances will come. And so T6 came to this realization as this match wore on, with Uni quickly thundering into a few boat lengths’ lead with a series of 3-metre shots. However, a few unsuspecting History undergraduate defenders had obviously not read up on the History of Cambridgeshire Korfball. Had they done so, they would have read about the legendary Nick Armitage and his golden hands (and mythical flowing locks.) Hungry Horace Armitage kept popping them in and T6 could just about keep the Uni boat in their sights. And then they reeled them in. Claire took the post. Leo and Max got in a line. Phoebe started to dart more. Luka suddenly dwarfed his five foot ten opponent. Caroline and Zoe got up close and personal with their girls. And suddenly it was 8-8 with a few minutes left and Uni had used all their subs. Alas, two late Uni scores meant that Nick’s 5, Max’s 2 and Luka’s 1 was not enough to gain a point. Still – it’s nice to see training moves being put into practice. Given that Uni are pushing for promotion, that was a heartening display.

T6 then had a derby match against T5, who were so worried about this one that Jenny and Caroline had to call in a big gun or two from T4 while Adrian defected! Or maybe he was tired. Heaven knows why. Whatever, T5 won this one 13-5 and there were a few interesting match-ups: Billy was giving Ella & Mateja the ‘Carswell eyes,’ sending them the wrong way for runners; Nick F’s arms and Max’s arms had a battle royale under the post (when Nick could engineer it) and as far away from the post as possible when Max was attacking; Tommy v Luka was a blur of two swooping swallows fluttering around hips, under arms and between legs; Jenny and her shadow Phoebe/Phoebe and her shadow Jenny – where one goes the other is surgically attached; Bierman v Bierman, with Bierman (Hana) looking on; Theo and Leo (chuckle.) Anyway, goals for most, with three for Jenny and three for High Priest of High Fives Leo standing out; there were two each for Nick (one per arm) and Tommy (one per Lamborghini leg.) Mateja’s single goal was the pick of the bunch and she added another rule to her bulging notebook of Korfing rules: on a free pass the attacking players must be 2.5 metres from each other. T5 are clinging onto the P2 and U1 coat-tails at the top of Division 2.

There was a derby match the previous Sunday too, between T3 and T4 – a horribly one-sided encounter which saw that brute Tom Coslett bullying his T4 defender around the post and gobbling up drop-offs like the greediest chick in the nest (which, according to most reputable wildlife documentaries, is the first to be eaten by predators – just saying, Tom.) Swapping sides to be with the big kids was Good Samaritan (or ‘Turncoat’ if you prefer) Sam Sadat, keen to help out T3 (or turn his back on his beloved T4) out of kindness (an insatiable lust for goals and glory.) He sheepishly (callously) scored three goals, refusing to celebrate (smirking at his old mates) and doing the club a good turn (being a mercenary.) I jest of course. As if that wasn’t enough, Keira couldn’t handle Korfing cold turkey and decided to play for T3 too, terrorizing Rhodesy in the process. It didn’t really help that Ollie, Becca and Legal Eagle Catherine Weller were popping them in too (old Professor Francis given a lesson by the young apprentice.) You can rely on Sarah to show us how it’s done though, scoring two fine honourable goals. It was a good showing too for Mateja, who scored, attacked, defended and learnt more rules – this time about conceding penalties by making the faintest bodily contact once your attacker is ahead of you and shooting. 20-7 the flattering scoreline there.

T3 then took themselves off to Ely to play Vikings 2 on Sunday. One or two of them warmed up by playing the SERL match a few hours earlier. Catherine, giving Luuk a lift, prepared for the game as all consummate professionals do – going to the dump and dropping off the rubbish. Luuk, though, managed to climb out of the dumpster and beg a lift to the match off a passing farmer. Just joking. Both were on the score sheet in an even more one-sided encounter than the T4 match the week before. Lavinia was back and hungry. She pocketed five – her average – and that will keep her Instagram followers happy for a while. Everyone scored actually – except Jess, who was letting the young whippersnappers have their fun – whippersnappers like Take-No-Prisoners Tom Coslett, who scored 7 (greedy chicks Cozzo….that’s all I’m saying.) T3 stay top of Division 1 but need to keep up the good form, lest City 1 or Phoenix 1 catch them up.

We also had two other matches on Sunday. The SERL match between Tigers and City was a very entertaining affair, finishing 24-21 to City, who were up by six at the halfway point and whose girls were running riot, with some clever running and spot-on shooting. Then Jess said enough. She put down her knitting needles, gave her girl a reproachful look, rolled up her imaginary sleeves and stopped her in her tracks – as did the others. Harry turned up the heat on both boys, whose temperatures were slowly nudging upwards and were getting subbed off. Rob’s magnificently high, serenely still shots floated in and subbing in to dominate the rebound was Luuuuuuuuk. Helping the cause no end was a formidable Rosie, scoring five and doing a Jess on her girl in the second half too. Joseph’s three against the elastic arms of his omni-present and one-man defence opponent was impressive too. 1 for Martha, 1 for Catherine and none this time for coach Ross and his blue suede shoes, which at least took the prize for fanciest footwear, beating Luuk’s lovely orange clogs into second place.

Last but not least, the National League team travelled to Croydon to a full strength Trojans and got beat 34-18. It could have been a lot worse after the opening ten minutes as their girls hit the ground (and poor Liv’s calf muscles) running. Sian, Caitlin and Molly started to pick up the pace of the game though and slowly worked them out. Unfortunately, Trojans also have a few handy shooters on their team and try as Andy might, the Brookes boys can score from anywhere, even out near the car park, which is what Dave Brookes was in the mood for here. Toby may forget a pitchside list or two but he never forgets how to score, bagging a cool seven here. There were three each for Josh and Laurie and three for supersub Jonny. Coach West was not present at this one as he was busy peeping his whistle in Germany at the Europa Shield tournament (won by Bec, no less.) Good man Chris! The indisputable reffing don. No VAR needed there. He will be happy to know that we are still clinging on to fifth and hanging onto the coat-tails of fourth and have two winnable games coming up before Knights on 16th. Let’s shake the play-off tree and see if anything falls out.

Lots of matches coming up over the next few weeks…and more travelling…..(deep breath)
On the road again (yee-har, yesssssir,)
Goin’ places that I’ve never been (Maid – Stone GirlsGrammarrrr School,)
Seein’ things that I may never see again (FAT CHANCE!)
And I can’t wait to get on the road again (to Sports Park, UEAaaaa, nnnnnNorwich)***

***(Nobody will understand this except fans of Willie Nelson or Shrek.)

Sun 02 Feb 2020 13:00 Kingfisher 1 Tigers 1 Maidstone Girls Grammar School
Sun 02 Feb 2020 14:30 Kingfisher 2 Tigers 2 Maidstone Girls Grammar School
Sun 02 Feb 2020 19:00 Tigers 5 Lions 2 Perse School for Boys
Sun 02 Feb 2020 20:00 Tigers 4 Vikings 1 Perse School for Boys
Sun 09 Feb 2020 10:00 Tigers U14 Vikings U14 Cambridge Regional College
Sun 09 Feb 2020 12:00 Tigers U14 Tornadoes U14 Cambridge Regional College
Sun 09 Feb 2020 12:45 Tigers 1 KV Perse School for Boys
Sun 09 Feb 2020 14:15 Tigers 2 KV2 Perse School for Boys
Sun 09 Feb 2020 19:00 Tigers 6 Vikings 3 Perse School for Boys
Sun 09 Feb 2020 20:00 Tigers 4 Vikings 2 Perse School for Boys
Sun 16 Feb 2020 11:30 Norwich Knights 1 Tigers 1 Sports Park, UEA
Sun 16 Feb 2020 13:00 Norwich Knights 2 Tigers 2 Sports Park, UEA
Sun 16 Feb 2020 18:00 City 4 Tigers 6 Impington Village College
Sun 16 Feb 2020 19:00 Tigers 4 City 2 Perse School for Boys